First of all, I had the idea to post this because of a manga series(Real Clothes by Makimura Satoru) that i have just read today. There was a part in the story where the female lead faces a dilemma about her love life. After what happened to our dear female lead, I realize that a relationship also depends on the two lovers wanting to stay in that relationship. Okay. I did not understand what I just have typed.
Hmmm. You see, all couples in a relationship, I believe, experience some type of dilemma like losing the spark because they've been dating too long, or maybe, getting afraid of what the future for both of them. I even overheard somewhere or maybe read it online that some couples fight because of unsatisfying sex. Lol. Okay, before those who are in a relationship spit fire on me, let me make it clear. I have never been in a serious relationship, that of between lovers. So, these causes of dilemma in a relationship is solely based on what I have heard from a friend, relative or from somewhere. Also, i read a lot of romance and josei manga series and articles online.
Back on the topic, wanting to stay in a relationship, I think, is a very difficult decision to make, especially when you feel like nothing going to work out anymore.
"It's too tiring already."I've read that from dozens of manga series that I can't even remember what the titles are. Well maybe it's not the exact words for all manga series but the message is the same. Sometimes, a person is just to exhausted from trying to fix the same dilemmas in a relationship, from experiencing too many problems or maybe from doing the same things with your lover for years. I remember a relationship that did not have a they-live-happily-ever-after ending. A lady friend of mine dated a guy for years. They were so in love in my eyes that it seemed it will be forever. I was really sad when they broke up after 5 years of dating. Even up to this day, I wish that they would still end up together, though the two are both happy with their new love lives. I asked my lady friend why they broke up. She was no longer happy with the relationship. I remember seeing her expression when she said that. She was more like bored with the relationship that she ended it. The guy loved her so much. But he let her go. I asked myself then, "Why didn't she just stay, at least for the guy?" However, I realized now that if she stayed solely because the guy loved her, she's just pitying him. She'll hurt the guy more. Better that she left the relationship after all. But it still bugged me, if she really was just bored of the relationship or if she really fell out of love? Maybe she got bored and fell out of love. I don't know. I will never know.
I've never believe that once you fall in love you can't stop it. Not always, at least. When you know your limits, you can STOP falling in love, before it's too late. And i think it's the same with falling out of love. Before it even happens, you can do something about it. If you think you are already bored of the relationship or you have fallen out of love, why not try something new with your lover, something you have never done before with that significant person. I think that's much better that breaking up so suddenly. Of course this won't work at all times, but at least try it. Also, maybe you guys can sort things out. Sometimes, we think we already are honest with our significant person but there are times that we just don't say what we truly feel. Of course, good communication already comes in here. However, this is what I feel:
I believe that before sorting things out with your lover, you must already have chosen if you will stay in that relationship or not. Set your goal first.Of course, for me, I will always choose to stay! I don't plan on having my own family, that's why i am not interested in having a lover, but if ever I choose to fall in love someday, i do hope my first will be my last, for he will be my husband. No matter what difficulties we face, I will never leave his side, because I know I will always find a reason to love him.
Instead of listing the reasons of why the relationship should end, refresh your memories on why you have fallen in love and choose to stay in love with your significant person. Every couple faces dozens of dilemmas, and if you have stayed long enough in the relationship, why suddenly leave just because you feel you have had enough? I think a person will always get tired of something, but still he/she can overcome that, and continue fighting. It's too idealistic. Yes, it is. I admit I am most of the time an idealist. But, realities come from ideas. There's nothing wrong if you try doing this. It may not work but at least you tried.
-----> Hindi ko pala ito na-publish before -_- two years ago pa ata ito eh.
